someone posted this article on my Facebook page tho other day. what do you think about this?
so i read it. i was surprised that it was on one of my favorite resources, the gospel coalition blog. i will admit, i agree with a lot of what is on this blog and find it helpful in many ways.
but this article, i felt really missed the mark.
it's basically a woman explaining why she thinks we shouldn't discuss our kids sin's in public. Go read Don't Tell Me Your Kid's Sins by Megan Hill , before you read my response.
and here's why i disagree.
Isn't the bible one big blog post of God discussing his children's sin? even in detail? we even get knowledge of heart issues and thoughts. The bible is story after story of humans messing up and God rescuing them. if it had not been for his open and honest dialogue of his children's sin (yes, even hall of famers like david and moses! and noah and joseph!) how would we gain his perspective on sin? that we need a savior to rescue us. we are weaklings. and more than that we are helpless and lost in our sin.
paul says we can BOAST about our weakness.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
you may say, well that means your sin, not your kids.
not so. this is how we are called to live as believers.
we can all talk about sin openly and honestly, without shame, because Christ says we're covered in his blood and He has forgiven us.
when we are weak, he is strong.
so i will tell you that i'm a sinner and so are my kids. i will tell you what we're struggling with and sometimes i will give you details. (gasp!)
you will find yourself in my details.
Jesus is found in the details.
he cares for the details.
he died for the details!
the author says,
" I may have authority over my children, but I don't own them or their stories."
so how do i talk about my story if i can't share their story? if i'm having parenting struggles and it's exposing my heart, how do i leave out the part where my child's sin exposed my sin?
you can't. all of our stories are intermingled.
well then who's story is it? neither.
those stories don't belong to you or them!
they are God's.
all we are asked to do is GLORIFY HIM with whatever story we have. make us look small and him look big.
us becoming small: that is glorious. and that can only happen when i say, we are a mess. we need a savior. don't look at me, look at Jesus.
in whatever venue he has asked you to share. who are we to judge if this person should remain quiet about their children's sin or not? for instance, parenting books.
thankfully many authors discuss their kids sins in parenting books. phew! what a relief. practical help through details.
more than practical help, we can live freely in the knowledge that our approval rests in christ alone.
i believe when we have that knowledge, we can create an honest environment. we can pass this truth of approval in christ to our children.
do we do this by secrets? surely not! (show me this verse in the bible)
or do we do this by proclaiming our sin often to each other in confession? in front of each other and in front of our kids. in our home, we discuss sin. you will hear me telling my son that i am sinful and that i am just like him. we all need a saviour.
hell, i can do it on the interweb even.
because i don't need your approval. i am able to be bold and talk about my husband's affair because i am obedient to the call of God on my life and i know that what he has asked me to do will not turn void. i know that God has changed my husband and myself and i don't have to worry that you think he might do it again.
guess what, he might! that's not the point. Glorifying God in my life is. portraying Him as the reward is my goal, not a happy marriage or amazing children.
and i can talk about layne's ungratefulness because guess what? i don't need to know what you think about my son. i know what God thinks about my son and it has everything to do with HIS SON.
and have you followed the journey?
God is changing my son's heart. and my heart. and many people's. all because i let them in, through this community of blogging. i proclaim God's glory when i tell you that my family is sinful.
even more than that, we circle back to the environment we want to foster in our homes. by talking about sin, i want layne to know that it is nothing to hide. it is, however, something to be brought to the light. however your family does that, however you personally feel called to do that, then so be it.
be obedient to the call of the spirit.
not all of us are meant to share internet-publicly and that's ok.
of course, if we are sharing sin just to share sin, that does no one any good. we should proclaim it to bring hope to others and share the gospel. it should always go back to the hope we have in Jesus.
but to shame parents for talking about their struggles in parenting to their bible study(!!) is destructive and harmful. these communities are meant for such honest sharing. in fact, if you're not going to be honest and deal with deep sin issues in your own life or destructive patterns in your family or children, why be in a small group?
what is the point?
to only talk about how your kids love baseball and love to play board games... cool. but where is Jesus in that?
i have lived in this type of community and it is harmful if that is the only depth you go.
same with social media. you'd prefer we post only the pretty things?
what a distortion of God's word.
He does not share only pretty things.
(i.e. psalms. job. lamentations. etc)
you call it "crass oversharing"
and i call it the Gospel.
to proclaim our sin freely and to let the shadow of the cross cover our sins. to discuss burdens and hardship, to bask in God's discipline of our sin is where i want to stay. publicly and privately.
to live in a community where we can openly share hardship and sin and to call each other to the grace that covers our sins.
God loves you. and you have nothing to hide.