Friday, September 6, 2013

advice//wedding shower//minted style

m'baby sister's getting married in september so of course we threw her a wedding shower in collaboration with my friends at minted.

this is craziness, mags. you were just 7 years old and it seems like yesterday that i was blind-folding you and having you race me. in front of the refrigerator. ever so strategically.
that was so fun when you ran into the fridge and all the magnets fell. and then i left you there while you cried and went upstairs to be an awesome teenager.

this is neither here nor there. you're getting married. and it's a big deal. i'm so happy for you to start this new part of your life. i know you'll be running to me for all sorts of advice, so i'll spare having to humble yourself and ask.

here's the deal:
a lot of people think that getting married is going to make you happy. it will. sometimes. and sometimes, probably most of the time, it will not. that's because it's not about you.
it's not even about him.
it's about God. we mirror the gospel when we learn to lay down our lives for each other. when we deny ourselves and say, you are more important than me. you die to yourself when you know you could yell some crazy things to them and hurt them so bad. after all, they deserve it. but remember something.

remember that you do some awful stuff. mean stuff.
God knows that about you and still loves you and pursues you every day. he still says, i forgive you when you don't deserve it. he gives you so much grace.
and out of that grace, you are able to give your husband grace. it's the only way.

if you think you can go into marriage, and do this in your own strength, look around. christians and non christians have the same divorce rate. it's really easy to walk away from someone that hurts you deeply. your spouse will be the one who can can love the deepest, but they can cut the deepest too.

and so, you'll need something more than human love.
because your husband can't satisfy that need.
God made it this way for a very important reason:
He, himself is your satisfaction.

(you can see more of this jadeite cake platter at another party HERE
and at another party here)

i know you didn't ask for this. but i'm your bossy old sister and this is where i get to write things while you're forced to listen.

when things get difficult, really difficult, don't look inward. don't "believe in yourself". don't wake up and try harder. the answer is not inside of you, but outside of you.
 simply ask God to show up and change your heart and mind. ask HIM to help you love your husband like He loves your husband.

and when you do it all wrong. when you mess up bad and hurt your husband. when you act stupid and say things you shouldn't have said, know that God still loves you. He will not turn away from you. He knows all the worst things about you and still chooses you.

that is how you love each other. not tips on communication, not better sex, not more kids, not a bigger house. not a better job.
you wake up and ask God to help you love a person that is sometimes unlovable because you recognize that you too are the very same.

good news for newlyweds who don't know what they're getting themselves into when they say, I DO. none of us knew!
maybe God does that on purpose.
funny Guy.

thank you minted for sponsoring this shower. you guys are my favorite stationary company for a reason. always, always, making things look incredible...wonderful and talented designers!
these party supplies can be found in the "party decor" section.

also i'm FREAKING out over their foil embossed baby announcements. gah.


  1. Bam. Truth. Thanks, Jami for speaking it!

    Oh, and it looks like it was a beautiful shower, congratulations to your little sis!

  2. Great post! And a great reminder for all of us already-married-folk.

  3. perhaps you should have a child. then you can use those baby shower invites.

  4. Beautiful shower... beautiful advice. :-)

  5. Dang it Jamie Nato. I am petrified to get married because I am terrified that I will fail for him every day. Truth is, I will, but this is a huge, strong, slap in the face reminder that it is ok and that he and God will love me anyway and I will grown in love and life and Im sitting here reading your message to your sister as a message to me and crying my little eyes out because your words are to dang beautiful. Thank you for sharing this today. Congratulations to your sister and a big stinkin THANK YOU to you today. Rock on sister :)

  6. love this. a good word. thank you

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  8. Favorite BLog Post EVeRRRR. Thank you.

  9. well said. truly a great reminder for those gettin married and those that are trying to stay married. we cannot do it on our own strength. just cannot. impossible. I wrote that book. God's grace, wooing and love for us as well as our spouse is so much better than our own feeble attempts. surrendering has never felt so good. great advice. beautiful party!

  10. love this. sharing this with some engaged friends!

  11. This is absolutely wonderful! I'm still a newlywed with a new baby and I couldn't agree more with this post. I'm a new viewer of your blog and I LOVE IT! I look forward to each new post. Thank you for being a blessing!

  12. Jami Nato, some days I think that God tells you to blog things just so that I can hear it. Every thing that you blog about our Father goes straight to my heart. I think that he created us to think in similar ways... lets just say I really related to your "hermit" post about Emily Anderson. (I have hermit tendencies as well.) Your posts have been transforming me and pointing me back to Jesus and I can't thank you enough for that.

    This post especially was what I needed to remember today. I am not married, or getting married, but I am currently pursuing a dating relationship. I have already hurt my brother in Christ in so many ways through my own selfishness. I am so grateful that we both know that we are in this for the glory of God and that only through his grace will we make it through.

    Thank you for the encouragement. God cherishes you; he looks down at you and is well pleased.

  13. When your kiddos are grown and doing their own thangs, promise me you'll go party planner pro. Seriously. Promise.

  14. So, so, good! I love how you show pics of yet another beautiful shower you threw, but write about things so much more meaningful. Thank you!!!

  15. Love this! I'm a newlywed and needed this! Thank you!

  16. Beautiful shower! I've been feelin' the pink and green And such good advice. If only we all understood this from day 1. :)


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