Friday, June 24, 2011

layne, you're so predictable.

layne is pretty predictable. he doesn't like change. so my strategy is to talk any big event through with him like months and months in advance.
so last year i said,
layne, you're going to go to a new school.
your old friends won't be there. which is a bummer but you'll make new friends.
Not even David? where's David going to go?

layne, at this school, they don't speak english. (it's a french immersion school)
i like spanish. uno dos tres quattro...
no buddy, it's french.
i only want to speak spanish. they can speak french and i'll speak spanish.
(i didn't mean to take this diagonal. i was holding lila's hand and snapping pics without looking, hoping to catch something.)
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so when he went to kindergarten camp every day from 8 to 3(i know, right?!) this week, i was a little bit nervous. considering his past "first day" experiences and his desire to avoid changes at all costs.


i'm not going to lie, when we dropped him off on monday, i kept my phone next to me all day waiting for THE CALL.
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well today(friday) i got it. oh ya.

hey, layne is having a pretty tough time. i think he's pretty exhausted from the week. will you come pick him up. (not a question: a statement)


of course. i'm sorry.

layne most likely could be exhausted. but he didn't want to go to school that day because we told him he had to apologize to his teacher. she told us the day before she asked all the kids to say
Je m'appelle (their name)
layne refused to say it all day. even though he could say it. he refused. but said it ten times on the way home. because he's my first born. and no one is the boss of him.
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so anyway,  he had a melt down before school today, would not apologize when he got to school, and basically, acted naughty that morning. amazing,my child.

when nato picked him up in the office. layne was acting quite chipper.
oh hey dad! i just got exhausted today!
ok then we'll go home and you can take a nap.
actually i'm not exhausted. i'm fine.

the director looked at nato and said...i have one like that too. i feel for you.
insert the awkward parent smile here.
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he manipulated the situation so he could go home. naughty and smart. and i'm sure he really was overwhelmed for the week. he did this when he went to the nursery at church. he did it at preschool. and he's staying true to himself even now... he wouldn't be my first born if it went smoothly.

his punishment? he sat in his room allllllll day. even ate lunch out of his lunch box in there. hopefully he'll think kindergarten is better than sitting in his room? probably not though. when i checked on him i saw him eating his graham crackers sitting in a comfy chair. with his legs crossed. smiling. like an old man enjoying a glass of scotch.

we shall see how next week goes. the excitement is palpable... can you feel it? me either.

37 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness, your little guy is so cute and on so clever.

    I have been stalking your blog for a while now and just love it! I love how real you are and thank you for speaking from your heart. You rock girl and give so many others inspiration.

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  2. this is hilarious...to me.
    not to you, i realize.
    that guy knows how to get things done, dude.

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  3. my first born would love to eat graham crackers in the comfy chair with your first born. i think they'd get along swimmingly. ;)

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  4. Oh I have one of those too. Blake would rather spend all day in his bedroom/bed with no blankie than go to school and play. I don't get it!!

    Loved the pictures!

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  5. Oh my...I love that ornery little Layne Nato. He's so good at being cute while he's naughty. I can't wait to see his little Asian self walking around speaking French.

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  6. hahahaha oh boy! sounds like you have your hands full my friend.

    "when i checked on him i saw him eating his graham crackers sitting in a comfy chair. with his legs crossed. smiling. like an old man enjoying a glass of scotch." Yeah that totally cracked me up! bwhahaha

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  7. Like an old man enjoying his scotch. I laughed out loud because I could totally see it---I have one of those first borns too! they think they're clever cats those first borns!....and they sort of are.

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  8. Naughty first borns. They are as stubborn as can be. Love 'em!

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  9. layne anthony, you're a brilliant/naughty child like your mother. one day you'll make your siblings eat a "hershey's kiss" (a neatly shaped piece of mud wrapped in foil...topped with a sprinkle of sugar), or poop off the fort. i'm sure you'll make momma very proud.

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  10. Quite a clever kid he is, I can almost relate to him when I think of having to go to work. I wonder if acting exhausted would get me a day off with pay, I might just try it. :)

    "like an old man enjoying a glass of scotch". Oh, I can just imagine. LOL!

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  11. Ok, I'll admit to schoolgirlish squeals whenever a new post from you shows up in my reader. And yeah, I went back over the last couple weeks and read ALL your posts. I'd like to try to convince you now that I'm not a scary stalker fan but, yeah, I just kinda admitted I am...
    So, (shuffle), my kids are totes 'that' kid too. It helps me to remember that when my kids act up in public they are not showing others that I am a bad mom, just that they are little sinners in need of a Savior, just like me.

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  12. 1. layne is SO cute.
    2. will you teach me how to take a decent pic??? i need help.

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  13. So everybody else's comments are about their kids. I don't have kids, and I think this story is pretty funny... cause I love kids like Layne! So hopefully next week will go better!

    In other news.. I need to meet you instead of just ohhing and ahhing over your kids when I see them go into church. That's so stalker... right?

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  14. That might be one of the funniest things I've ever read! Oh...I mean.. you should really have a serious talk with him for that kind of behavior ;)

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  15. Oh man. I know a couple kiddos like that. Luckily you and all their parents are one ahead of them...I just dont know what I'd do. That last image...so funny.

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  16. Smart and stubborn!! What a cutie :) Good luck!

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  17. i am absolutely positive my boy would be the same way if we took him to school...we'll find out one of these days.

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  18. the image of him with his feet crossed with his version of the scotch makes me smile! i love your story-telling skillz.
    you rock.

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  19. I think you just wrote the story of when my oldest goes to preschool for the first time this fall :)
    Today my husband asked him if we wanted to go to the park (the PARK) and he said, "no thanks. I'll just stay here with Mommy and you and Grayson". SUCH a homebody.

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  20. This post absolutely cracked me up. I feel like I have so many of these moments with my little one... but you verbalize them so much more clearly (and more hilariously) than I ever could.

    I found your blog through Katygirl and just had to say, "hello!" :)

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  21. Question: french emersion school? Im not sure what this is but it sounds interesting. More on that please??

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  22. Hey Carrie, we live in the city and although we LOVE it, the school district is terrible...except for a few charter schools. One being a French school. It's pretty awesome though. Did you know French is the second most spoken language in the world?? Fun fact. We're hoping this will prove helpful to layne when he grows up.

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  23. this post makes me nervous. because my boy could be like me. which would make him very stubborn. and smart. thanks. ;)
    just found your blog. you are splendid.

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  24. um ... that just decided it. i am moving to your neighborhood. because really i was only halfway decided before. french school??? parlez vouz yes please?!? ari is the same way but just in things that include any type of physical risk. we are talking shrieking and yelling of the dreaded "i wish i had another mom!" for taking her out in the ocean.. while holding her.. where i could still touch. nice. p.s i'm a first born and still think no one is the boss of me. so good luck to us. :)

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  25. 1. Typical first born. Mine faked being sick once just to come home. Now I never believe him when he says he doesn't feel good and he has to go to school unless he has a fever or is throwing up. Lesson learned. For both of us.

    2. French immersion school. Interesting.

    3. Is it a year-round school? Why is he just now starting? We did year round school for 4 years. We're becoming a weird homeschooling family this fall though. :)

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  26. Jami, that's awesome! There are many charter schools in our area as well, one of the main ones being a German one! I would much rather learn French as it is a beautiful language. He could also pretend to be Joey on friends...je'ma pelle CLAUDE. Thanks for the info! Good luck Layne!

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  27. Hey Kelly, during the summer the school has kindergarten camp to get them ready for the school year. It's mon-fri all day and it's free... Can you believe that?!

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  28. Like an old man enjoying a glass of scotch. LOLOLOL. Oh that Layne. Hope it goes better next week. :)

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  29. My first born is like this (I only have one though)so we always say, "our next ones will be easy". I'm pretty sure I was like that too though. I used to always be "sick" so I had to go home. Hopefully the cylcle breaks. Here's to hoping!

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  30. Rad lunchbox, mind sharing where you got it?

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  31. hey mommy elizabeth, i got it at gapkids on clearance last year.. :( but i bet if you search online you could find some cute ones!

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  32. Hilarious!! You have to admit he's pretty smart though if he's got all that figured out! lol! I love the idea of a french immersion school!!

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  33. Hilarious!! You have to admit he's pretty smart though if he's got all that figured out! lol! I love the idea of a french immersion school!!

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  34. Enjoyed reading/following your page.Please keep it coming. Cheers!

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  35. I can't relate at all. Just kidding. I had to check the blog url because I thought I was reading about my kids. In a few months I'll be posting a similar story about Ethan...except he'll be melting down in front of the school saying he wants to stay in preschool FOREVER and kindergarten is dumb!!!

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  36. I'm so glad that despite your frustration, you are keeping your sense of humor! The last line of this blog entry completely cracked me up..and I could picture it. And French-immersion school? Sounds schmancy & artsy cool. =)

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  37. umm Jami this is hilarious and the fact that you saw Layne give a little old man content smile while eating his graham cracker makes my day. I love it!

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