Sunday, January 16, 2011

so we took a real vay-cay. and i wore a G-string.

i write this as my husband spreads aloe vera all over my back...in a super non-sexual way, mkay you guys? let's keep this mature...

 you see, in mexico, anything goes. so i wore my string bikini at 22 weeks pregnant. the G-string has an american flag print on it(stars on the top and stripes on the bottom) because, in my opinion, there's never a bad time to show your patriotism. God bless Amerrrrrrrrrica...
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man that joke never gets old. but ya, i wore a total mom suit. like one with a skirt. booya, players. i am not trying to shave my bikini line every 5 seconds and show off my rotund thighs. i need to get lazer hair removal on every inch of my body, i know...but i mean, that's a lot of money and you know how i feel about spending a lot of money. which is why i didn't pay for this trip to cancun, mexico...no, my in-laws did. because they are crazy and generous and they spoil their children and grandchildren. luckily, i happen to hang with those 2 groups often--which means, heck, i get spoiled too.
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so we left kansas when it snowed a million inches. (jealous?) and it was sunny and fabulous...for one day of the trip. who cares, we weren't trudging around in 6 inches of snow. cloudy or sunny, it was great family time. we ate a lot... all inclusive, all-you-can-eat is not good for a prego lady trying to rock a swimsuit.


why yes, thankyou i'll have a cinnamon sugar waffle AND an omlet every morning for breakfast. with a glass of orange juice. and maybe a bowl of fruit loops...i don't know... let's leave the cantelope out on this one...that's just too many extra calories.

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here are some people who don't care about calories(nato's sis and her fiance). damn their young bodies! excuse me...moving on...
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so at night they had these shows. sometimes the ladies in the show were truly half naked and layne and nato had to sit out of them(a.k.a. go on adventures around the hotel!). like the "vegas" show...we were in the front row. wow...i saw way too much. the high kicks were a little too "high" if you know what i mean. but for one of the shows, he got to stay. and then he tried the tricks out with nato. and has continued to do dare devil tactics on the couch today...slipping off the couch on one stunt and saying, whew, i'm ok!
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side note: lila did stay for the vegas show and LOVED it. she then proceeded to dance after the show and was applauded by the audience. i'd like to say i was proud, but i mean, she was trying to be a little stripper. so, although entertaining, not my shining-est moment as a parent.


i love that the kids got to spend some quality time with the grandparents...a.k.a. lola and lolo. they sure are ridiculous when it comes to my children.
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they never say NO...which is awkward sometimes when they are taking complete advantage of them. but whatever. who put that shovel there?
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the kids loved the pool and the beach...well layne didn't like the texture of the sand on his hands but he worked through that...and lila was scared of the ocean. they hadn't ever seen the ocean before...give them a break!
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we tried to take a family pic with the self timer...i ended up capturing a lot of other random, hairy people in the background. but whatever...those are the people you love to remember, right? no?
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what's hard is when you go from this in the morning:
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to this at night:
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something just seems wrong. but you know, we're glad to be back. i'm glad to not be eating so much anymore and i ordered some prego workout videos today...so as to pretend like i'm going to get into shape. but really, i just like organic pop tarts a lot so i don't know.

OH and blog book winner according to random.org is chassidy! whew hoo! email me and i'll give you the voucher code. so exciting...

27 comments:

  1. rachel and I are sitting together on the couch and sad we couldn't go on the vacay with you. But glad we could laugh at you when you got back. You're BACK!

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  2. i laughed out loud numerous times reading this. "who put the shovel there?" hilarious. glad you had fun! i suffered the snow in kansas for you. you missed out :)

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  3. Loved all the photos!! Esp with Lolo and Lola ;)

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  4. Your inlaw's are adorable! Oh my gosh, I love them hugging! And I love the family picture, random hairy bellies and all :)

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  5. my high school/when i still want to feel young and cool i make people call me it nickname is lolo. it makes me feel even cooler now that i know people call their grandpa's that. looks like a blast. welcome back to frigid. :)

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  6. Your BLOG is GREAT!!!! I love this post!! Thanks for sharing :)

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  7. I am sitting here in my chair with my coffee laughing out loud and Kate keeps looking at me like I'm crazy and saying "mom!... I can't hear Dora!" Sooooo sorry miss kate. Anyway,... Looks like yall had a great time and I really enjoyed reading all about it. Oh.... and you are still really funny.....

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  8. so jealous!! Sounds like an amazing time!!!

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  9. Nooooooooo...I'm supposed to be the winner. ;) That's okay, you can just get me a blog book for my birthday. ;) Thanks for sharing "va-ca" photos! I'd like to pretend I'm happy you guys had a great time but mostly I'm just jealous. ;) You got some really great photos of Nato with the kids - super cute! :) Hey I think some of us are getting together for a playdate today if you want to come! Cause I doubt you have anything to do, like 17 loads of laundry and stuff. ;) Text me!

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  10. Are your toes French pedicured or do you just have awesome snazzy toenails? Looks like you had a fabulous time, happy for you but kinda (i mean really) jealous. Your in-laws are adorable. Welcome back to freaking freezing cold winter wonderland. Seriously so glad you're back, I need and missed my daily dose of Jami. I'm also recruiting you to help me with some stuff... I'll be calling you. Don't screen my call m'kay?
    Love, Jenn

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  11. ps. I'm super bummed about not winning the blog book give a-shway. I have 3 books qued up to order... At least you got the ball rolling for me huh?
    Love, Jenn

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  12. Wow, I totally hate you right now. Mexico while I suffer with snow and wild children? Just kidding. I am not a hater. I a am a lover.

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  13. How absoultely wonderful for you and the family. So happy for you.

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  14. you are like a ray of inappropriate, hysterical sunshine in my day. thank you. more please.

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  15. Looks like fun! I love going to the beach. It's my dream to live there one day...or maybe KC but that one is oddly less likely

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  16. uhh…i was waiting for a pregnant in a bathing suit photo and you left me with NOTHING.

    i am so incredibly jealous that you got to go to mexico, even if it was cloudy.

    and i love how your and nato's beach embrace picture is the same as the inlaws.

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  17. wait a damn minute.
    how did you wear the american flag g-string when i'm sitting here (at my computer) wearing it now?!
    i thought we shared this bad boy?

    apparently you were tired of sharing the same g-string with me. i'm sad about that.
    and yes, i'm cold sitting here in it, at my computer.
    my neighbors are peeking in and saying "somebody put some clothes on that girl!"

    oh and biotch, enjoy that cold cause it's about to get hot again for ya! woooooo hoooooo!

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  18. These photographs are amazing! You are so talented. And you crack me up =)

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  19. Your inlaws are adorable. Love the pics. Glad you guys had a nice vacation! And glad you flaunted the g string. Only a prego can truly work a g string.

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  20. Oh I am SO jealous! I would love love to get a break from this never-ending cold and ice! Looks like you guys had a great time! :)

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  21. We live in California and we STILL have not taken a vacation to Mexico. We may have the same weather here in California, but location change is always good. BTW, I totally thought you were rocking a thong! LOL!!!

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  22. I'm glad you had a wonderful time on vacation! Makes the passport post office trip seem worth it, huh? That story still cracks me up! :)

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  23. what an awesome trip! love all the pictures... esp the one with the shovel bwhahahaha

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  24. So the "what the what" post linked me to the post above which was followed by this post (just explaining the stalking route)...annnd your kids have a lolo & lola!!! SO DO MINE! That's all =)

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  25. So, just perusing your blog tonight.. nbds..

    and i laughed out loud at the mini stripper Lila.

    Because, as it is.. true story at the post office once the girls were hanging on the poles that hold up the table you write out all your shiz..whatever, and the sweetest little old lady turned to me and said
    "It's cute now, but try and keep 'em off the poles when they're older."

    Yeah... that REALLY JUST HAPPENED.

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