Tuesday, May 11, 2010

i like you.

ok so i got this book from my husband, i like you by amy sedaris, for mother's day. it is hilarious. i mean, it totally makes fun of a typical cook book and any martha stewart magazine you've ever read. which is awesome... because, you know what? we all take ourselves too seriously when it comes to inviting people into our home.
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my husband is filipino. i don't know what it is about that culture, but they are known for the hospitality skills. my husband wants people in our house all the time...friends, co-workers, neighbors, the mailman(yes, he has invited the mailman for dinner). i was way opposed to this idea at first. after all this is my home. my messy home. i'd have to clean the bathrooms and what not. uggg. plus, fill in the blank home project isn't done. what would people think if they saw a room taped up and prepped for paint. the humanity!

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the point is, if someone asks me over for dinner, whether it's steak or rice and beans, i could care less...i'm more flattered. wow, they like me. it doesn't matter if you aren't a good cook(i mean, it helps, ha) and you order pizza. and i really don't care if your house is messy or if your kids are running around like crazy slapping each other with goggles. oh wait, those are my kids.

the problem is, people can't really get to know you in the foyer at church. people can't get to know you passing by your stroller, waving hi. people can't get to know you zooming through the hallway at your kid's school. it takes someone willing to step up and say, why don't you guys come over for dinner tomorrow night?
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first of all, having people over for din will make you clean your bathroom. this is good for everyone. we had people over for dinner the other week(whom i had NEVER MET BEFORE) and i for sure left the toilet scrubber in the bathroom sink all night long. side note: after cleaning the toilet, i sanitize the scrubber in the sink, let it dry, and then put it back behind the toilet. anyway, i only found the toilet scrubber after they left and i was getting ready to wash my face. i truly gagged. i knew she had used the bathroom several times with her kiddos and had seen it. of course, she said nothing because she wanted me to die from embarrassment. i won't say her name, but it starts with an A and ends with Shlee. i had to send her an email that very night that was like, please still be my friend. don't shun me because i like clean toilets.

back to the point. when you invite people over, you're extending your friendship to someone that probably needs it. or maybe you need it more than them. at our table, we have shared a lot of laughter, unexpected tears, spilled drinks, and good (even some bad)meals. mostly we've made memories with people who will hopefully be or friends for the next 50+ years.

all that to say, our culture doesn't really do this hosting thing very well anymore. and that needs to change. so who are you having over for dinner this week? don't say Jesus. that doesn't count, silly.

12 comments:

  1. does it count to TAKE someone dinner? cause i'm doin' that on friday... and i expect an invite to a nasty/delicious dinner at your house very soon. or i guess i could invite you guys to my house but then i'd have to clean my bathrooms and i just don't feel like doing it. i'm sure you saw how nasty they were when you came over last week... well i still haven't cleaned them so there you go. i'll be waitin' for the invite.
    love, jenn

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  2. Okay first, that ham cake is the GROSSEST.thing.EVER. SEcond, believe it or not, it didn't wierd me out to see the toilet brush in the sink (dirty or not). Promise. AND I let you see my closet. Di-saster zone.
    Please come over for less-than-mediocre food (hot dogs provided) anytime!

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  3. no jen, that does not count. they have to be IN your house. so they can see your dirty bathroom. which i didn't when i was there last, dangit!

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  4. it's like you can read my mind!

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  5. Oh you remind me of the importance--it's the hospitality! Not the spread.
    Though I do clean bathrooms when people come over:)

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  6. ummm...how about you? wanna come over for dinner? you guys are seriously awesome hosts!

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  7. Wanna come over tomorrow night? Please?! It's not that far of a drive! Seriously, though....This is one of my favorite things about you and Nato. You're inviters. That's a trait that is hard to find in friends! And you always seem to have amazing cookie dough ready to go whenever I'm over. That's what I call hospitality!

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  8. I'm pretty sure I need this book. And your toilet brush in the sink? Hilarious!

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  9. How sweet! You wrote this post for me! ;) Seriously though, I love this philosophy. I SO struggled having people over to my ghetto townhouse at first and finally realized a) I have a lot to be thankful for b) people do NOT care, they're just happy to be invited and c) hospitality means a lot more than a clean, perfectly decorated home and a 5 course meal. I honestly feel like God calls us to open our homes and share our blessings! And that is why we will be hosting 11 people this weekend, in our tiny home, awesome. ;)

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  10. Sweet! I clean the house as much as I can before guest, but sometimes I just don't care...so come on over Jami! Bring your hubby, your kiddos to our little home in Eudora... I will make sure to make organics, ha ha :)

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  11. Your my favorite :)..I love the way you think. You and my husband (and Jenn for that matter) are my soul mates.. people like you balance *freaks* like me. The weird thing is that I'm having a friend over tomorrow afternoon for a playdate and I'm doing everytihng in my power to tame the inner "clean freak", "everything's perfect" woman that lives in me. i might actually blog about this very topic as it's something god's workin on me..
    You can come over anytime! I'd love to get to know you better.

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  12. This is one of my most favorite books. I asked for it for Christmas and one of my very (conservative) family members bought it (perhaps without reading through??). I think I spit out my coffee about 19,039 times reading it to myself throughout the night while everyone else unwrapped presents. Love.

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